The sub-moronic ramblings of a semi-functioning illiterate


  • Has the stress of facing the holiday season alone got you down?
  • Are you dreading another Thanksgiving Day dinner defending your recreational life choices to your staunch Republican (insert Military Branch Rank of your choice here) Father?
  • Tired of being seated between your fighter pilot/Sunday school teacher/Abercombie & Finch model big brother and your half-dead Grandmother who smells like cheese?


From the warped and creative minds of the Blogosphere’s most talented writers comes a retelling of classic fables and fairy tales, each one more twisted than the last. F*CKED UP FAIRY TALES is the first of a two eBook novella series created by THE BLOGGER COLLECTIVE, a talented group of participating authors from around the Blogosphere. It’s childhood as you never remembered it. 


F*CKED UP FAIRY TALES  is guaranteed to make your brother come out of the closet while simultaneously giving Granny Limburger a moist-y.

F*CKED UP FAIRY TALES has been proven to increase penis size, get your car better gas mileage and give your ex-girlfriend a scorching case of rotten-crotch.



31 responses

  1. Reblogged this on polysyllabic profundities and commented:
    I had the fun of adding my twisted, creative version of a fairy tale. Please check it out and buy your copy – money goes to charity!!

    November 28, 2013 at 8:04 am

    • Thank you!

      November 28, 2013 at 9:27 am

      • Already bought my copy…..can’t wait to sit down tonight with a glass of wine and read!! Thanks for letting me participate.

        Now I just have to keep an eye out for GOA 2. 😉

        November 28, 2013 at 9:27 am

  2. Is this the one I am in? I need one!!!

    November 28, 2013 at 11:19 am

  3. Wait, is there a real paper version?

    November 28, 2013 at 11:20 am

    • There will be soon!

      December 7, 2013 at 3:44 pm

  4. The Elite of Just Alright

    Reblogged this on All Men Dream… and commented:
    There may or may not be a retelling of Goldilocks and the Three Bears in this compilation…that may or may not be written by yours truly.

    November 28, 2013 at 7:28 pm

    • Allegedly.

      December 7, 2013 at 3:45 pm

      • The Elite of Just Alright

        There is no evidence to support this allegation however. It may simply be hearsay.

        December 7, 2013 at 4:59 pm

  5. Reblogged this on Edward Hotspur and commented:
    Hooray! It’s finally here!

    November 28, 2013 at 9:26 pm

    • Thanks for the reblog. 🙂

      December 7, 2013 at 3:47 pm

  6. Hooray. This is a good idea!

    November 28, 2013 at 9:26 pm

    • Yup. I had lots of help with this idea.

      December 7, 2013 at 3:47 pm

  7. Reblogged this on sandylikebeach and commented:
    I’m now a twice published author thanks to H.E. Ellis! If you like your fairy tales slightly or completely f*cked up then you’ll enjoy this book. All proceeds go to charity!

    November 29, 2013 at 7:52 am

    • Awesome as always, Sandy!

      December 7, 2013 at 3:48 pm

  8. I’m working on your remaining Fairy Tale now. I like this edition. Don’t worry, my story won’t be porn-y.

    November 29, 2013 at 8:23 am

    • Damn. I like porn-y.

      December 7, 2013 at 3:49 pm

      • But only a specific kind, right?

        December 7, 2013 at 8:42 pm

  9. Aw, hell yeah. It’ a party, now.

    November 29, 2013 at 9:27 am

    • And as usual, I missed it. 😦

      December 7, 2013 at 3:49 pm

  10. Pingback: Announcing H.E. Ellis’ F*cked Up Fairy Tales! | The Fog of Ward

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  12. Pingback: F*CKED UP FAIRY TALES — NOW AVAILABLE | Read Tom Lucas

  13. Sorry, I am the half-dead grandma who smells like cheese and if I do the story won’t be as good.

    December 6, 2013 at 1:50 pm

    • Oh, I’m gonna like you.

      December 7, 2013 at 3:50 pm

  14. I’m just so glad you didn’t go overboard on the on-line promotion. 😉

    December 10, 2013 at 3:43 am

    • If I had any kind of time you’d have seen a billboard all the way from Canada!

      December 22, 2013 at 8:51 am

  15. Reblogged this on emeralddragun Studios and commented:
    These are some really weird and twisted tales written by some great people. Plus I’m in it so…

    December 20, 2013 at 5:59 pm

    • Yes you are!

      December 22, 2013 at 8:49 am

  16. Reblogged this at with:

    These are some really weird and twisted tales written by some great people. Plus I’m in it so…

    December 20, 2013 at 6:03 pm